In this episode, I will be talking about the different types of introverts (Social, Thinking, Anxious, and Restrained) and a quiz you can take to see where you score. If you like the episode, please follow me on social media, links below. Let me know what you think. Did you take the quiz? Do agree with what you got?
Some parts of the transcript may be edited for better readability, but the content remains the same. Mostly removed duplicate words, vocal filler words, and added/removed some words for clarification. Added text are in fuchsia.
Hey everyone! This is Meliza and I am the Talkative Introvert.
Alright, so now we're onto Episode Four. So currently, at the time of this recording, I haven't even gone live yet. I'm still working on a few things before I can go live. But I'm also still really nervous. I don't know. Like, it's kind of too late at this point, I've already kind of invested a whole lot of money. Like, it's not like I invested hundreds of dollars or anything, it's probably even less than 100. It's not even that much. But I'm still just nervous, like releasing this and then having everyone listen, and I don't know, I don't know, if I'm gonna just, if I'm gonna go the promotion route, and like, tell my friends and family and tell everyone to go and listen, or if I'm just gonna let it go. Let it run its course and like, see what happens. Like I have all these social media platforms I already created. Like I already created Facebook, the Facebook page and the Instagram page. And I have like the Buzzsprout website that comes with the membership. And I have like a separate Gmail account for it. And I did create a YouTube channel for it too. I still need to figure that out. Hopefully by the time this goes live, I figured out the whole YouTube thing (I did figure it out. Link in the header.) because I'm only doing audio, I'm not doing any video. I'm not quite there. And I don't know if I will ever do this, if I will ever record myself.
So right now what I'm currently working on, is getting some Intro music, I still don't have any. I really want my husband to make me one, but I know he's super busy. Sometimes he works weekends. He works in construction, so he's pretty tired by the time he gets home, which is understandable. So hopefully he does make me one. But probably won't be for a while. So until that happens, I'm probably just going to search up through some royalty free music, which is kind of difficult because I'm so indecisive. I'm... I can't... I've already gone through a bunch. But I still can't find like the one that I really want. And it kind of reminds me of... so if you guys ever watched The Good Place, I'm a lot like Chidi. So if you haven't seen that show, you should go and watch it. It's pretty funny. And it's really good. I really like the the writing. I think it's like on Netflix and Hulu. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, it is. But Chidi, one of the characters, is like extremely indecisive. And like that's one of his biggest flaws is that he can never choose anything. And I'm not as extreme as he is, but I do have an issue with trying to just pick one. And it's so hard because I've listened to like a good hour's worth of sample Intro music and they're like 30 second clips. They're not even, like full songs. And so that's a lot to put in an hour timeframe or something like that. I did it on my lunch at one point.
Okay, and then I'm also working on some artwork. So I had my friend Mia, draw/sketch something out for me. And then I was trying to create it myself. Like I gave her an example of what I wanted, and kind of told her what I wanted. And I tried to do it myself and try to digitize it. So like I scanned it and try to Photoshop it but it just looks terrible. And I don't I'm not good with that kind of stuff. I've never, like taken classes on photo editing or Photoshop or anything like that. So I decided to like, just go ahead and spend a little bit of money and like hire someone else to do it. So I went on Fiverr and picked out an artist that I liked and hopefully she does a good job. So I'm still waiting on that. So hopefully, by the time I go live, that's the artwork I come with, or maybe to look for somebody else. I really like her portfolio. I looked at her website, and I liked almost everything that she made. So hopefully, it turns out good. But you'll see it by the time this goes out. So it's gonna be kind of weird. It's weird because I'm not live right now. So like all these episodes are like way in the past, because I'm still trying to figure things out. But while I'm figuring things out, I still want to do some recordings and still do the podcast.
Anyways, thanks for listening to me ramble about like this whole podcast process. So... it's kind of nice to talk about it and kind of just reflect on like, the things I've been doing and things I'm going through and just starting this whole thing. It's been interesting so far, and there's like a lot of work put into it. Like I didn't... It's not just recording and then posting it, there's like more into it. Especially if it's something I want to really promote, I still haven't decided, obviously, in the last episode was talking about, like how this would be super, super awesome if I can make this my full time job. But that requires like full promoting, like telling everyone and trying to get as many listeners as possible. And that's kind of scary. So we'll see how this goes. Maybe it'll just grow organically? Who knows.
Reflecting on Last Week’s Episode
So in my notes I always say, reflect on the last episode. So when I write my outline for the new episode, I always listen to the last one, so that I can try to learn from it and figure out like, my style and like the things that I do and because I do want to try to make it as live as possible. So I try to do like... I try not to do a lot of editing and I try not to cut out a lot of stuff. And because I'm trying to make it more live, I don't think I accomplished what I wanted to in the last episode. So in the last episode, if you haven't listened to it was about introvert pet peeves. So I wanted to explain to someone who may not understand like, why pet peeves? Why do introverts have these pet peeves and explain, like why that may irritate or frustrate us or something like that. And what I ended up doing for the good portion of the the podcast is talk about how much I hate when people do that. I'm not really explaining why people don't like that. And so the whole intent of that episode was supposed to be me talking about the pet peeve and explaining why it's a pet peeve. And then using my real life experience as an example. But instead, I just ranted about why I hate when people do that stuff. So hopefully, I'll catch myself. And because like some of these episodes are supposed to be informative, right? They're supposed to be informational about introverts and how they are and how to understand us better and not just me ranting, and not just me complaining, which I feel like that's what the last one was about. But hopefully there was some, like, hopefully it was informational, like somewhat informational. But today's episode, I'm going to try to make it more informational. So hopefully, I don't rant too much. But I do hope that the last one was still good to listen. And hopefully you still stuck around even after that one. Let's see.
Introvert Types (S.T.A.R.)
Okay, so onto today's episode. So today's episode, it's gonna be about introvert types. So one of the other things I really love about doing this podcast other than doing the podcast, is I love learning about these new things. I don't Google stuff about introverts. Like, I don't research stuff about introverts on my free time. So I started doing that just for this podcast, because that's kind of like the theme I'm going for. Right? So it was really interesting to like, kind of Google some stuff. And like one of the things I found was these introvert types, and I didn't even know that was a thing. Like I didn't know there were types. So that's what today's episode is going to be.
Okay, so there are four types of introverts. There's the Social introvert, Thinking introvert, Anxious, and Restrained introvert, which make up the acronym S.T.A.R., which is, I don't know, interesting, I guess. So I'll go over what I found. I will link the articles in the description if you want to read about them. Some of them are kind of old. But I did match, or I tried, I did compare it to a newer article. And it basically says the same thing. So I don't know if there's any, like new findings since then, or like additions to these types. So I think it's still relevant. It still makes sense.
Okay, so the first one, so social. So a social introvert. This is the more commonly known introvert, the one that people usually associate introverts with. And this is someone who:
Typically says no to parties
Doesn't like huge gatherings
Prefers solitary activity over social activities
Likes to be in smaller groups
Experiences social exhaustion, so like giant parties are just too much for them basically.
And they embrace this JOMO instead of FOMO
So I didn't know what that was. I didn't look it up. But apparently FOMO is a more common acronym and it's Fear Of Missing Out. Did not know that was a thing. I mean, I've heard of fear of missing out, but I didn't know people were using the acronym for it. So JOMO is the opposite. it's the Joy Of Missing Out. So yeah, so social introverts are more of the solitary people who enjoy alone time and enjoy smaller intimate groups rather than larger, huge, you know, ragers.
Okay, so that's for social and then the thinking introvert. So these people are the daydreamers. So they're always in their head. One article states they love hypothesizing, creating ideating and storytelling to such an extent that dominates much of their mental space. So ideating, I think that's how you pronounce it. (I googled it afterwards and realized that I totally mispronounced this haha! Woops!) I didn't know that was a word either. So I had to look that up. I was like, what, what, what is that? So what ideating, which I think is how it's pronounced is to form an idea, thought or image. So yeah, so basically a daydreamer. So people, these people tend to be in their heads a lot. And they're thinking, thinking out scenarios, they're always daydreaming, which I've said already. I don't know. I'm not sure. It's like the best... For me, the best term to describe a thinking introvert. The article also does say, apparently, people tend to cling to their every word because they're good storytellers. Because they're very imaginative and creative.
Okay, so an anxious introvert. So an anxious introvert, just like the social introvert says no to parties, and huge gatherings, but because it makes them anxious. So not necessarily because they want to be alone or like to do a solitary activity. It's mainly because they're anxious about their surroundings and their environment. And anxious introverts tend to be very self conscious, they tend to ruminate about their social interactions. I had to also look up ruminate, but it does mean to reflect or ponder deeply on the subject. - I feel because I had to look up these words, I feel kind of dumb. I say that because like in high school, I took like honors English and Advanced Composition and in college I like scored really high in my entrance exam for English and like, had really good grades. Ever since college ended, I feel like I'm just getting dumber and dumber because I don't use any of that. Anything I learned from college. I'm not even in the same field that I got my degree in. Anyways, I digress. - So back to anxious, introvert. So yeah, so they tend to be self conscious with their environment. I really resonate with this too. And there's like a whole episode I wanted to get into that talks about this. But I totally get it. I don't do well, at gatherings, especially in large gatherings where I don't know anyone or if I don't know, a whole lot of people. And it's, it's kind of difficult because I'm, like, kind of an awkward person and on that, like, you know how people are like, I'm totally awkward and it's like a cutesy thing? No, like, I'm actually awkward and it's awful. It's not fun to be awkward. So I get this one a lot. And then I like tend to say things that I wish I didn't say and it bothers me for the rest of the day, and then sometimes it'll linger to the following days. It's just, I get this one a lot.
Okay, so on to the restrained introvert. So these people tend to take a while to warm up to someone. So it takes them a while to get going. It's one of those situations where like, once you get to know me, I open up situations. So they don't open up right away. They're pretty quiet at first. They usually want to observe a person first and like, really feel out the room before they open up and once they become more comfortable with you, then they'll open up more. Okay, I think, yeah, so that was the last one.
Introvert Type Quiz
So those are your Social, Thinking, Anxious, and Restrained types. So if you're thinking about what kind of introvert you are, there's actually a quiz for that. There's this article I found on blogs.scientificamerican.com, that talks about the history of defining introversion. And they talked about the different types and how to determine what type you are. So unfortunately, in this article, you have to calculate the quiz manually. And I was like, man, I don't want to do that. I'm pretty, pretty lazy. Plus, I found the article like on my lunchtime, so I didn't have a whole lot of time to do it. But I did find a BuzzFeed page, that puts it in a very convenient online quiz format and calculates it for you. So I went and did that instead. So I'll link that so you can take the quiz also.
What Do I Think I Am
So before I took the quiz, I was thinking, "Okay, so what do I think I am?" So I definitely resonate with all of them in a way. I do think I'm very... I resonate mostly with the social, anxious, and thinking type. But if I had to really choose, I wrote down... What did I write down? I wrote down that I am mostly thinking and anxious. The anxious because of like what I said earlier, I don't do well in large groups; I get really nervous; I get very anxious; I don't typically enjoy them; I don't typically enjoy being in new environments. Either with new people, I have to, like prepare myself before that. I tend to... So when I get really nervous and anxious, I tend to sweat, which is very unfortunate. Especially in situations where I'm drinking alcohol, because alcohol makes me really hot, it makes me really sweaty. And that makes me even more self conscious. So it makes me sweat even more, even if I'm not like hot anymore. So that really sucks. That's why I honestly don't drink that often. And that's kind of part of it. Not really, but I also just don't enjoy it that much. Not like I used to .I don't know, it's not as... as fun as it was like, in my early 20s. I'm not old, like I'm not that old either. And I'm not even 30 yet. So it's really... Like it was more fun a few years ago, I guess.
I Think I'm an Anxious Introvert
But how I really found out that I'm like more of an anxious introvert is when I started working in the more like corporate world, if you will. So in my last job - So I'm still in the same field, I just don't work for that company anymore - But in my last job, we used to have these, like, all staffs or all hands. And basically, it's just like a huge gathering of people in that company. Like in that region, in that Metro, and they get together and it's like a good time to start networking with people or meeting up with old colleagues or talking to like upper management and like, basically just getting your name out there. At least that's what I saw. I saw it as a networking opportunity. And I realized I actually really, really hate networking. I'm not really good at it like I've mentioned in, I think, the last episode, or whenever it was, like I don't do well with small talk. And I'm not good with coming up with conversation topics like just off the top of my head. So it's, it's difficult for me to like start the conversation. So along with that is I didn't like my first all hands or my first couple of all hands. Like I didn't know anyone, I only knew like the other like, interns who got hired the same time I did. And there wasn't a whole lot of us, maybe like I think three of us got hired after our internship and we weren't on the same project either. So it's not like I kept in touch with or like was in constant contact with them and have conversations them. So I didn't even actually really know them. So I only knew the people that were like in my department. But again, that was only like a handful of people. And it was just so difficult because we didn't... So the all hands would be like at a hotel or conference, you know, center downtown and we would have to go and drive there after work. So I'm literally going into this all hands where I don't know anyone except for maybe like a handful of people and I'm going in there by myself. And it was just really difficult for me and I started sweating like crazy, you know? I was getting really anxious. And I ended up just getting my badge, like my name tag, and then just going straight to the bathroom to just cool down and just like kind of stop sweating and just stop... I had to like, just really take a breather, and then try again. And then every once in a while, I would like go to the bathroom to take a break. And it probably... I don't know if anyone even noticed, but it was probably weird because I was going to the bathroom a lot. But after a while, it got a little better, because I started to finally meet new people and know more people. So there was actually people I can, like hang out with and go talk to. But there was one all hands where all the people I knew either left the company or they just weren't going to the specific one, because they started doing them like earlier. So they used to be like after work. But for some reason, they like started making it at like three o'clock in afternoon or something like that. But people don't get off till five. So we would have to schedule that into our day. And some people just can't make it because they have important meetings with the client. So I would go, and I would be the only one I knew. And that would just like, reset, and then I would be anxious again about it. Like I wouldn't be comfortable anymore.
So that's how I found out that I'm a very anxious person. Because I didn't have to do that in college. Like, I didn't do any networking. I didn't go to any of the job fairs. I didn't. I just went to my classes and that was it. So I didn't have to do like this whole Meet and Greet, where there's just like a bunch of people that you don't know. Especially in the job that I was in, everyone - even now actually - everyone's a lot older than me too. So like there's not a whole lot of people in my own cohort. So that was also difficult. Like everyone was like talking about their kids. And I'm like, I have a dog. And he finished puppy training class. So yeah, so I couldn't really relate to them, because there was like that age gap. But that wasn't the case for some people, like one of my best, like coworker friends is older than me. And I love her. I would like spend my whole lunch just talking to her, like I can talk to her for hours. But for the most part, it's hard for me to connect to some of my colleagues, because of the age gap. And it's not just work too. like, I don't like going to parties, like a friend's party, but I only know the host and like I don't know any of his or her friends. That's really, that makes me really nervous. When those situations come up, I usually ask like, "Hey, can I bring a friend with me?" That way, I have a buddy the whole time. And then it's not that bad. But if I am the only one there, and I don't know anyone, I either just won't go or only go for like a short period of time. So that's why I think I'm more of an anxious introvert.
I Think I'm a Thinking Introvert
And the other one is the thinking introvert. So I think I'm a thinking introvert, because I tend to be in my head a lot. Sometimes I'll just sit and think of scenarios in my head and just play it out in my head. And at one point, I wanted to become a writer because of that. I wanted to like, take my thoughts and put them into a book. I didn't pursue that. And I don't know if I will. I think this podcast is my version of that book I was gonna write because it's putting my thoughts out into a more audio version, basically. And I'm definitely a thinking introvert because I like to daydream a lot. And sometimes I'll just be at a party and I'll be on my phone, but I'll be just thinking about stuff. And I just use my phone because I don't want to just be sitting there looking blankly into nothing. So I just sometimes, I just pretend I'm just like scrolling on Instagram or whatever. And I've already like seen everything and I'm just like mindlessly scrolling. So it looks like I'm looking at something. I'm not just daydreaming. But now, like that's out and now, if my family hears this, they're gonna be like, Oh, is that what you're actually doing? But yea. So I think I'm thinking and anxious.
Why I Didn't Pick Social or Restrained
So that's what I wrote. And that's why I think I'm those things. And I didn't pick social even though social, I definitely resonate with. I think I'm very much a social introvert but I think I picked anxious because maybe I scored the same in those areas, but social, maybe it's like a point less than anxious. So that's what I'm assuming. If it's a score of like 38 for anxious, I probably got like a 37 for social or something like that. And then I didn't pick restrained because I mean, I have a podcast. So I'm definitely not restrained in that aspect. I think I'm situationally restrained. So I'm a restrained introvert when it comes to work and work colleagues. Because like, you know, it's the workplace. So I have to be really careful about what I say. And I don't like sharing too much of my life. I've made a mistake of doing that before. And gossip is a real thing. People do it. It's not just in TV shows or dramas, people love it, people tend to not keep promises, and they tend to talk about other people. And like, for me, I've let something slip before, it is totally accidental. Like, I didn't mean to let something slip, it just happens. So when you tell someone a secret, it's no longer a secret. So when you're at work, you have to be really careful. And that's why at work, I'm very restrained. Like I don't share stuff about my personal life that I don't want other people to know. And I try to read the room, you know? I try to read and observe my colleagues first to try to like, figure them out first, and see what type of person they are, before I start sharing anything. I obviously don't share anything about religion or politics. But there's like those little things that you have to really be careful, you know? People can have a different point of view. (For example, when you have differing opinions on how someone should've handled something.) And then I don't want to deal with conflict or drama in the workplace. So that's why I think I'm only restrained when it comes to certain situations.
I don't associate with it, like, outside of work when I'm with my friends or family or even meeting a new person. But honestly, like after college, that hasn't really happened much. I don't really meet a whole lot of new people outside of work. So I think I may have become a restrained introvert, only because most of my interactions with other individuals outside my family and friends circle are with work colleagues. But for the most part, I don't think I associated with it. I probably will still score in that category, but not super high. So yeah, so that's why I think I wrote down anxious and thinking.
What I Actually Got
I did take the Buzzfeed quiz. And unfortunately, the Buzzfeed quiz doesn't give your total score. So if you did the Scientific American blog version, where you had to manually score yourself, it'll tell you those different scores you have for each area. Buzzfeed, it just gives you your top two. So the top two, they ended up giving me is social and thinking. Thinking, I already knew that was what I was gonna get anyways, especially with this podcast. I think it makes it pretty evident that I am a thinking introvert because I'm like, basically, talking out my thoughts I would typically have in my head. But now, I'm recording it and putting it out there into the world.
And social. So like I said earlier, I think maybe I scored a point higher than anxious. And for social, that's why that ended up being on there instead of anxious. So I think those two are pretty close. I haven't done the manual calculation one. I probably will just when I'm not lazy. So I can figure out what my actual scores are.
But yeah, so those are the different types of introverts. I hope that was helpful, understanding the different types and I hope you guys take the quiz. I thought it was pretty fun. Like, it's pretty interesting to find out. I think, based off the definitions of each type, you probably already know what you are, but in case you don't know, it's just a fun quiz to do and then even have your extrovert friends and family take it. It'd be interesting to see what they score in. Yeah, so let me know if there are listeners out there.
If you're actually listening to this, let me know what you got.
Let me know the types that you are.
Do you think the quiz is wrong?
Do you think it's right?
Reach out to me on social media. Or just let me know in the comments below. I'll link all that in the description. I'm on Instagram, Facebook. You can even email me if you don't have social media. So that will all be on there. And I hope you liked this podcast. And if you did, I will talk to you in the next one. Thanks, guys.