Episode Description:
It’s Thanksgiving week in the U.S. and I reflect back on my last episode. This year has been rough for a lot of people, but there’s still some positives amidst all this negativity. I also went to reddit and asked the introvert redditors how they prep and recharge during holiday events. Stick to the end for the advice I got. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone, and I hope you can find some positive things about this year, because even though life sucks, there’s always something to be grateful for.
Disclaimer:
Some parts of the transcript may be edited for better readability, but the content remains the same. Mostly removed duplicate words, vocal filler words, and added/removed some words for clarification.
Transcript:
Hey, everyone! This is Meliza, and I'm the Talkative Introvert.
00:11
Happy Thanksgiving week everyone. Can't believe it's already Thanksgiving. This year has gone by so fast. They say that almost every year, but this year is just so different from anything I've ever experienced. I'm very intrigued about what 2021 will bring. I hope it gets better. But we'll have to wait and see, obviously. But anyways, in today's episode, originally, I was going to do an episode on how introverts can cope with the holidays and how to prepare for socializing with families, especially big families. But I want to go a different route, especially after the last episode. If you didn't listen to the last episode, it's a bit sullen, in case you couldn't tell. Just like everyone else, I'm sure, this year has taken a great toll on people. So yeah, it was a little sad episode. Kind of. But I wanted to reflect on the fact that no matter how bad things get, no matter, you know, all the terrible things happening in the world, there are still small things worth celebrating. There is still something to be grateful for. So, that's what today's episode is going to be about. I'll still share what I found on Reddit, though. So, I'll share that at the end. So, if you want to hear what I got from Reddit, stick around to the end. So, I'm definitely in a better mood, if you can't tell. Probably not because apparently, I'm a robot and have a monotone voice. But I am in a better mood than last time. Other than all the political stuff going on, this month is actually a pretty good month for me. I think I mentioned this before, but state workers received a pay cut earlier this year because of the pandemic. The pay cut, obviously, is not the good part. But it's not too bad. I did have to readjust our budget. And luckily, I was able to reduce some of our bills. And I did so happened to pay off a bunch of debt before the pandemic. So, I'm definitely grateful for that. I'm grateful that I actually keep a budget and I'm very money conscious. I didn't grow up with a lot of money, which I'm thankful for also. Which might sound weird, but it really made me really understand the value of a dollar. Anyway, so back to the point. For state workers, it means that we get two unpaid days off a month. So, in November, we got Veterans Day off and Thanksgiving and Black Friday off. And so, on top of that, we also get the two unpaid days off. And then I took an additional day off because I had an extra one there. Yeah. Anyways, so this whole month, I actually didn't work. The month isn't over, but the whole month of November, I'm not working a full week at all. So that's been really nice. Obviously, again, like I said, the pay cut isn't great. I wish I didn't get the pay cut because I literally just started with the state last year. Or no, it was this year. I'm getting all my days mixed up. And right after I got the job and got hired, we got the pay cut, which kind of sucks. But not gonna lie, I do like the two days off every month.
03:48
I also deleted my Facebook page and did some social media cleanse. I do social media and app cleanse on my phone regularly. I don't know if that's weird to do. But I do go through a "cleanse", quote every few months meaning physically and social media. So, social media, like I'll go through my friends list and the things I follow, and I'll go through my phone and if I don't use any of these apps, I'll delete it. And then in the physical world, I go through my clothes and everything and they do just a cleanse and I donate stuff on a regular cadence. And this media cleanse, this time around, I delete my Facebook page. And I'll go into that in a future episode about social media and everything. But it's actually been nice because then I'm not too stuck on my phone. So, my husband and I took like a little staycation. And the whole time, I was barely on my phone at all. Which is good. I didn't realize how much I was on my phone when I had Facebook. So now, I'll reach for my phone and then not know what to do. I mean, I still go on Reddit. But with Facebook gone, I realize that how much I use my phone. Cuz I'll go and reach for my phone and then I don't know what to do, like I said. Anyways. But yeah, so I want to do a social media episode later. So, I'll talk more about that later. Alright, so like I mentioned earlier, it's Thanksgiving week here in America. I know not a lot of... no, I won't say a lot. I know some people may not like this holiday. Because it's, you know, similar to Columbus Day, which, to some people, it's like celebrating the genocide of Native Americans. However... sorry, that got dark. However, that's not what my family celebrates. And that's not how we see this holiday. I feel like it's definitely different for immigrants or children of immigrant parents. Because a lot of times, you know, immigrants come from a third world country. And same with refugees. So, I think I mentioned this before, but in case you don't know, I am a first gen Filipino American. Meaning that my parents were not born in America, but I was. So, both of my parents migrated here from the Philippines. My older siblings, actually, my three older siblings, were born in the Philippines, but my brother and I were born here. So, we are first gen Filipinos. So, thanksgiving to us. We don't, you know, we don't discuss Christopher Columbus. Like we don't discuss the events that happened for Columbus to air quotes "discover" America, even though he didn't really discover America. It was here. Sorry, I don't know. But for us, it's a time for our family to get together. It's a time for family who live far away to get together. It's time to be grateful and thankful that we have a good life here in America. You know, all the future generations born or raised in America are very fortunate. Because they're given opportunities that they may not have had in the Philippines. We were taught from a young age that America is the land of opportunities. That's why people come here, as people fight so hard to come here to migrate here. And to start a new life here, right? If my dad was alive, he would tell you about all the things he accomplished and was able to do here in America. He loves America. Clearly, because he stayed here. I remember he used to call himself, 'The Filipino Godfather.' He was really into that stuff, the mafia and all that. And he's from New York. So, who knows? Maybe he actually knew people from the mafia? I don't know. I don't know his life in New York. I wasn't alive yet. Yeah, he was definitely put on a high pedestal, because he helped a lot of our family come to America and start life here. So, that's why he called himself the American... oh, 'The Filipino Godfather'.
08:17
But yeah, so we... a lot of my family from the Philippines did migrate here too. And I would say they are very grateful for it. And they do live a good life here in America. So anyways, thanksgiving was always the time to get together. And it was always a happy and joyous time. Like we don't celebrate Christopher Columbus. We just celebrate the fact that we can be together and that we have a good life here in America. And that we are given the opportunities that we wouldn't have had in the Philippines. So, reflecting back on the last episode, and I know it's sad. And I definitely needed that break that I took. But it reminded me of this saying, I don't remember. I think got it out of 'King of the Hill'. I don't remember where it came from. But I think Peggy said, "It's okay to be sad today, but not sad tomorrow", or something like that. And it made me really think like, obviously acknowledging your feelings and your emotions is very, very important. And obviously that saying may not be the greatest. Like, you know, 'Take whatever time you need if it's more than a day.' But the most important thing to take out of that saying or that quote is that it's okay to be sad, but not forever. Like, eventually you need to get yourself out of that rut, right? And so, reflecting back on it and taking the break and just taking this time for myself, and taking the staycation with my husband, it has really reminded me of the things I'm grateful for. And all the things I'm grateful for. And that's really what this week is for me. And what this week is for a lot of people. Thanksgiving week is a week for, you know, reflecting on your life. And even though 2020 sucked, you know, there's still things worth celebrating. And one of the things worth celebrating, is you guys, the listeners. I am still in shock that people listen to the podcast. If you follow me on Instagram, you would know that I reached over 1000 downloads, which I didn't think would ever happen. It's obviously not as much as like a high-profile podcaster. But at the same time, I'm not planning to be that high profile anyways. I didn't even expect to get that many downloads per episode. Especially not to be reaching 1000 downloads in six months, or however long it's been now. I wasn't expecting that at all. So, thank you for listening. And what a perfect time to do a little shout out. So, shout out to my number one YouTube fan, David. David, you know who you are, because you're the only one who listens to my podcasts on YouTube. Just kidding. He's not the only one. But he's the only one that comments. So, in case you didn't know, I do upload my podcast episodes to YouTube as well just in case people like using YouTube instead of Spotify or Apple or whatever you use. And David always comments. And it's nice when someone leaves a comment, and I could interact with people who actually listened to me. So, that's awesome. It's nice to have that interaction. And I really hope you're listening to this episode, David. Because I want to thank you for the times that you do comment and for listening to the podcasts. Watch, it's the one he doesn't listen to. Also, I wanted to quote this from one of his comments, because I think it's possibly one of my favorite discussions of humans I have ever heard. So, this is what he wrote, "The dominant life form on this planet are ghosts of unknown origin, driving around and meet covered skeletons." Thank you, David for that clip. Because at the end of the day, we are all just ghosts of unknown origin driving around in meat covered skeletons. Thank you to everyone for listening. And thank you to everyone who has ever left a comment or DMed me and liked and shared my posts. I am very appreciative of that.
12:50
Alright, so back to what I was saying earlier about being grateful for all the little things. Like I said, it's okay to be sad and to cry and to be mad sometimes. It's okay to acknowledge those feelings and take the time you need to cope and to, I don't know, deal with your feelings. But it's not okay to stay in that constant state of mind. Somehow, some way, you got to get yourself out of that rut. Because no one else can do that for you. You are the only one in charge of your own happiness. That's why I wanted to do this episode. I needed to get myself out of that rut. That's why even the tiniest of things are worth celebrating and being thankful for. Something as the ability to even breathe. Some people have to rely on external entities to help them do that. You know, simple things like the ability to smell, to taste, to do really anything without the assistance of others or some type of machinery. That's a privilege. Not everyone has and it should be celebrated. And it sounds silly because to the average person, it's so small. But people forget, like, not everyone has that ability, you know. And that's ultimately what Thanksgiving is for me. And just all the gray little things in your day-to-day life that gets you through the things that you do all the time. All the simple things that you do like being able to brush your teeth, to brush your hair, to put on your shoes. These are all little things but at the same time not everyone can do it, right? So, be grateful for that. Be grateful that you can do something. These miniscule, simple tasks that if they were taken away from you, it would make life a lot difficult and more challenging. What I learned in 2020 and being an adult, is that life sucks. But there's always something to be grateful for. You know I'm alive, I'm healthy, my husband is alive and healthy. My dog is alive and healthy. I have food, I have shelter, I have a job. I have family and friends I care about and who care about me. The list is honestly infinite. So, I hope this Thanksgiving week, when you wake up every morning, I hope you can find something little to be grateful for. Something small, that you're thankful you can do every day. Or that you have... that makes you happy. And I hope that little spark of joy will help you get through your day. And help you get through the rest of 2020. So, I told you guys that at the end of the episode, I'll share that advice I got on Reddit. So, like I said earlier in the episode, originally, I was going to do an introvert type episode about coping with family gatherings and large gatherings. I mean, I know we're amidst a pandemic, but some people are still seeing each other, you know? Some people are making sure that they can still see each other for Thanksgiving. And even though California is in the purple tier, I highly doubt people are not gonna see each other for Thanksgiving. So, I went to Reddit and asked for advice. And I asked people, how do they prep before and during the holiday event. So, the first one, first advice I got was, "Don't go. Because of COVID." This one is obvious. But if you've already been around family or you show off on social media, that you've been going out, this may not work for you. At that point, you might as well just say, "I don't want to go", which is something you can do actually. Just don't go. That's not an advice I got. Oh, actually no, that is... that was an advice I got. So, you know, obviously just don't go. The next is to go on a social hiatus a couple weeks before any big event. Whether that be Thanksgiving or any other event, really. And so that's kind of what I did, other than just quarantining myself for two weeks. Also, just because my mom's a person of high risk. Because she is older, she has diabetes, blah, blah, blah. And so, we did take a social hiatus for that. But then also because, you know, we know that we're going to end up spending the whole day there and socializing. So, if you... I mean, it's kind of too late, because it's already Thanksgiving week. But for Christmas, you know, take a little social hiatus or whatever event you guys celebrate.
17:52
So that's another advice I got. You know, take some time for yourself and don't do anything social, bank up on that social energy and reserve it specifically for the event. Then during the event, give yourself some type of holiday job. So, for example, someone said, "Be the one who's making some type of dish." Like making a dessert, making the mashed potatoes, or cutting up the veggies, or any type of responsibility that allows you to take a break from socializing. And maybe you just stay in the kitchen for a while and do these little jobs. And then once you're ready, go back out, right? So, volunteer to go to the store, someone forgot something, volunteer to do dishes, just anything, any little job. Then if you run out of stuff to do, this one, I got a lot, but go to the bathroom. And a lot of people suggested this one. It's funny because that's what I do. When it gets a little too much or I need a little break, sometimes I'll just go to the bathroom. Obviously, sometimes I go because I need to go. But there have been times where it got a little too much. And then I would just go to the bathroom and just like, I don't know, wash my face, wash my hands, or do something. Fix my hair, whatever. However, if the bathroom is occupied, just go outside. The garage or into an empty room. The problem though, that I've come across when I want to go away from the main area is that people tend to follow me sometimes. Someone did mention though, like just pretend you're on a phone call and tell people you're on a call and we'll be out in a second. That way they kind of have to leave you alone because you're on a phone call. And then it gives you time to just pretend you're chit chatting and then go back out. Then the next one someone suggested, 'Partaking in some type of substance'. First of all, I just want to say I don't condone of any illegal activities here on this podcast. However, if you're of age and it's legal and you're of a healthy state of mind, then you do you. You do whatever you need to do. But yeah, I wasn't going to go into detail. That one I got, like a whole slew of different substances I could take. And I was like, eh, I'll skip out on that one. I don't really drink anymore. And yeah, I don't even know what other substance I would take. And I don't want to take any in front of my mom. So, that's kind of weird. But yeah, you do you. And then last, but not least, just go home. If it gets too much, just go home. That's why when my husband and I go out of town, regardless, if it's close to a family member, we still like getting our own hotel or Airbnb. That way we can leave and go back to just a place where it's just us. I highly suggest that if you have the means to do so. All right. Well, that is what I got from Reddit. The introvert subreddit actually is a really great place if you want to ask questions. They do even welcome extroverts to ask questions, that they want to understand more about introversion and all that. So, go check it out. And if you want to ask a question, just ask the question. It's a pretty good subreddit for that. And you'll most likely get a response, even if it's just like a few. All right, hope that was helpful. Let me know on social media, what you do to prep for the holidays. And also let me know what you're grateful for this year. All right, you guys, I'm keeping this one a little short. Also, because I forgot that I was going to do an episode. So, my bad. But wanting to come back on here though to say Happy Thanksgiving. And to let you all know how grateful I am for this podcast and for you guys and for just all the great little things in life.
22:22
Also, a little reminder, in case you didn't hear my last episode, I am taking a holiday break. So, no new episode next Monday. But I'll be back for the following week to finish up the season. So, I'm going to end the season in December and then start up again in January. I don't know when season two will start. Because there are some stuff I want to get done before I start season two. But if you want to keep up to date with the podcast, just follow me on Facebook or Instagram. You can also check out my website at thetalkativeintrovertpodcast.com. All the information will be on there as well as in the show notes. Again, thanks so much for listening to the podcast and I'll talk to you guys in the next episode.