S1E28 - Social Media Cleanse

Episode Description:

There’s a lot of things to hate and love about social media and in this episode, I talk about the good and the bad. I also briefly talk about my opinion on The Social Dilemma documentary on Netflix and how it kind of sparked this episode. Let me know about how you felt about the documentary. What’s your love/hate relationship with social media? Is it more love or more hate or somewhere in the middle?


Disclaimer:

Some parts of the transcript may be edited for better readability, but the content remains the same. Mostly removed duplicate words, vocal filler words, and added/removed some words for clarification.


Transcript:

Hey, everyone! This is Meliza, and I'm the Talkative Introvert.


00:11

This week has been pretty rough. I almost didn't do an episode. But here I am. The season is almost over. So, I want to make sure I got these last two episodes out. I hurt my back last weekend. I don't know how. And I don't know why. But anyways, that's not what today's episode is about. So, today's episode, I'm going to talk about social media and me doing a social media cleanse. So, I'll get into that. I have kind of a love-hate relationship with social media. But before I get into that, I wanted to do a shout out. I don't get a lot of interactions from listeners. But when I do, it has always been really positive. And I actually really enjoy interacting with you guys. It's been really heartwarming to know people actually enjoy the content and are listening. I did have one time someone DM me on Instagram. And before, I guess I'll get into that, just letting you know, like if you ever DM me, I wouldn't share that info on a podcast or screenshot it and post it out for everyone to see. So, don't worry, I'm not that kind of a person. I will always ask for permission. I've seen people, you know, on YouTube, for example, screenshot DMs and share them to the public. And I don't know, it just seems very dirty and scummy to do that. So, unless you're calling out a liar or proving your innocence, there's really no reason to be doing that and sharing private messages. So, I will always ask you for permission first. But I did want to give a shout out to that person. I won't say who it is or what they said. But they did reach out to me because of my 'I'm very tired' episode. If you haven't listened to that one, it's a little sullen. So, the person just reached out just to ask how I'm feeling. And that was really nice. And I really appreciated that. And I really hope you're still listening and enjoying the content. But thank you so much for reaching out. I also did want to read another apple review. So, if you listen to previous episodes, I started to share reviews and comments to show my gratitude, I think. I don't know how else to show my gratitude other than to do shout out because I guess people like that, right? I've noticed that people like shoutouts. So, here's my showing my gratitude to you. And sorry, I don't really know what people like or it's hard for me to understand what people like sometimes. But anyways, so this one is from username 'vortex3'. And this person wrote, "So for me, not only is the content relatable (I identify as an introvert), but so is the host! I really love the little moments of “oh did you hear that pitter patter? It was my dog.” And I also really enjoy how the host includes us in her podcast journey, she’s so candid and funny! One of my favorite episodes so far has been the one about introvert types (ep 4 I believe). I hadn’t heard about these before, so it was very interesting for me! And maybe like other introverts, I love taking quizzes that will tell me something about myself haha. I think this host/podcast does a great job of sharing personal and educational information. We get to hear her thoughts and perspectives, but also, she takes the time to look up, read, and share sources with us. Give this podcast a listen! :) " Thanks so much for that review. I'm really glad you didn't think that my dog's pitter patter was annoying. Because he does, you know, you hear him sometimes on the episode, and I really hope it doesn't like annoy people, but he's my co-host. He's gonna be around. You'll hear him bark every once in a while. But anyways, I really appreciate, and I love these reviews. And I'm so glad that you guys took the time to write them and to rate my podcast. And really these reviews just really reach into the deepest crevices of my heart, and really lightens my cube like soul. So, please keep them coming. I'll be sure to feature in the future episodes. Alright, let's get into the actual episode. So, I'm going to talk about social media. And just so that you guys know, in case you didn't know, I'm a 90s baby. So, I'm a millennial. So, the start of socializing online, for me, really didn't start until we think, with the AOL chat rooms. So, I don't know if you guys are the same age as me or if you remember, but they used to have those AOL chat rooms. And I don't remember how I got into it. I think my friends were into it. And this is like, maybe elementary school/Middle School. And they were really into these chat rooms. And then they showed me how to go into one. And it was just like, kind of like a Discord. Right? It's just a giant chat room. Basically, just random strangers talking to each other. And I remember the most popular question is always what's your ASL? I don't know if you guys remember what that is, but it's Age/Sex/Location. And then I feel like the chat rooms, really, that's where the acronyms really blew up and blossom to fuel. Like, obviously, acronyms have always been around. But the iconic ones, like the 'brb' or the 'GTG' or 'TTYL', 'LOL', you know, 'TFTI'. So, I just remember that was my taste of using acronyms. Especially because back then, we didn't have keyboards on our phones either. So, we had to use acronyms for texting. But anyways, then I started getting into the ones where you can actually create and customize your own profile and start socializing with people that way. And then these websites also were... mostly I think they were meant to post your blogs, but a lot of people just kind of you just used it to interact with people. But I know, like, for example, I had a Zynga, people in my family had it. And they got me into it. And it was a place you were supposed to share blogs. But I think, like I said, people were just using to interact with each other. And then I had a Friendster. But the Friendster was really just for my family in the Philippines. I think Friendster was really big in Asia for some reason. At least, that's what I read. And so, I only had that just to interact with my family in the Philippines. But then I think everyone kind of migrated to my space. And so, I had a MySpace page. And that's when I really started getting into it. And I remember really getting into updating my page and picking out the right music and really filling out my bio and everything, I got really into it. And that was like, I think the start of it was MySpace, really. It was definitely different from it is now. Because now you have your smartphone, but back then you had to use a computer to go online. And I wasn't on it all the time because we had a household computer, which I think is pretty normal for families. But we had to share it. So, I had to share it with my brother and my mom. And obviously my mom used it for whatever like adulting stuff, I guess. And then me and my brother had to share after school. We had designated time we could use it. And that was kind of a struggle. Because obviously, he would want to use it, but then I would want to use it. And I remember arguing about when we can use the compute. Because we really only had the one. And then eventually, you know, we got laptops and stuff. But back then, that's kind of how social media was. It was just something you went on after school when you're allowed to. And then if you're lucky to have a household computer or multiple computers, you could go on it longer, like you know. But now it's just completely different. It's like at the palm of your hands. And you could go on it all day, any day, whenever you want. And that really didn't start till college, I think. Because I didn't get smartphone until college. And I was pretty late in the game. I think everyone already started getting a smartphone, probably end of high school. But I was broke. And I didn't buy a smartphone until way later. But my first smartphone, if you guys remember if you're my age, is the LG Optimus 3D. And it was pretty popular because it did 3D imaging. So, you could take pegs and it would be in 3D. But it's not like VR 3D obviously. It was like, you know, those holographic cards where if you look at it, and in a certain angle, it's 3D. It becomes 3D. So, that's what it did. So, you could take pictures, and it'll turn it into that. So, you have to look at it at a certain angle and it'll be 3D.


09:36

But that phone kind of sucked. Because no one had that phone. So, it's not like I could share it with people. I couldn't send pictures to other people with the 3D imaging. And it was really like... it gave you a headache when you played 3D games or looked at a 3D video or picture for too long. So, it was kind of stupid. Plus, it was already outdated by the time I bought it. Because it was on sale. And that's why I bought it because I could afford it. And all the social media apps were already updating at that time. So, I couldn't... I don't think I had an Instagram yet or Snapchat or anything. I think I only had Facebook because it was so outdated. And it wasn't compatible with the new apps. But man, we've come a long way since then. Anyways, so I was huge into social media as a teen like high school and in my early 20s. I remember friending everyone and I remember writing some cringy things on Myspace and Facebook. And so eventually, if you guys know the story, MySpace kind of died out. It's still around, though. You can still... I think they're mostly focused on music. But that kind of died down. And everyone, even my family in the Philippines, and just literally everyone just migrated over to Facebook. And Facebook was pretty big in high school. And then I just remember like I said, I friended everyone. And I said some cringy things, and it was so embarrassing. But you guys know how Facebook does like the memories, and it shows you something you posted years ago. Like, 'Today, five years ago, this is what you wrote' whatever. Anyways, one time that showed a post from high school. And I think I wrote something along the lines of, 'Feeling so tired today. And so, bleh. (Sadface).' And I literally typed out sad face because I don't think there were emojis yet. And I just remember thinking, when I saw that, I was like, why did I bother posting that? Who actually cares how I'm feeling? Or what I'm doing? Or thinking at that moment? And it's not even anything remarkable or anything. But that's kind of how Facebook used to be. It used to do like, 'Sue Johnson is feeling _____.' And then you fill in the blank. Or 'Sue Johnson is doing blah, blah, blah.' So, that's kind of how it was. So, I think mine was like, 'Meliza was feeling so tired today. And so, bleh.' It's so cringy. I don't know why I did that. It's just so... I don't even like thinking about it anymore. That's how bad it was. And Facebook keeps giving you those memories and I hate when it gives you a high school memory. So cringy. Anyways, so my love and obsession with social media definitely faded. The older I got. I started posting less and less. I used to post almost every day on my Snapchat story, Instagram Stories wasn't around yet. But my Snapchat story, I was posting something almost every day. And I was on Instagram all the time. And Facebook all the time. But that kind of just lessened the older I got. And then I stopped taking pictures. For example, my food, every time I went out, unless it was a special occasion or something. Like, I did for the cruise earlier this year. But before I used to take a picture of my food for Instagram, literally every time we went out. And I don't know if you guys remember, but there used to be this website called 'asianstakingpicsoftheirfood.com' or something like that. And I honestly wouldn't be surprised if I'm caught on there. Because I literally took a picture of my food every single time. And I'm thinking now like, who cares? Because we usually just went to the same restaurants. Because we were just broke college kids. So, it's not like we went anywhere fancy or anything, like anywhere exciting. But yeah. So, I hardly post on my story now. And on Facebook, I usually just share funny memes or videos. Like this year I was a little more active because of political stuff. But even with that, I could probably count on my hands how many posts I actually shared on Facebook. So, it really isn't that much. I just... I don't know. It's kind of exhausting. And I just don't have the need to do that anymore, I guess. I don't know what happened really.


14:28

But anyways, so I did mention that I did do a social media cleanse before Thanksgiving. I kind of do this on a regular cadence. Not just social media alone, but I do clean out my phone of unnecessary apps. I even go through my contacts and check if they're up to date. I even...umm, like I'll text people and just be like, "Is this still your address?" or "Is this still your email?" And I'll do that every once in a while. And I even go through, like physically go through my clothes and stuff. I don't know why I do this. I kind of do it almost on a quarterly basis. I do just have this urge every once in a while, to just clean. I don't know, what do you want to call it. I guess like spring cleaning, but for all the seasons of just my life in general. But more specifically for this episode, social media cleanse. So, for Facebook, for example, I did go from a few 100 friends to less than 100. I stopped following people I didn't talk to or weren't friends with. For example, in high school, it was normal for people to just friend each other just because they saw each other in high school. Like just because we went to the same high school or had maybe the same class, it was normal to just friend them. So, I deleted all those people. Because we're not friends. We just knew of each other. And it was weird that we were even friends to begin with. So, all those people are gone. And then this Thanksgiving, I decided to just delete Facebook altogether, to be honest. I just didn't think I needed anymore. Especially because Facebook has definitely changed since it first started. Right now, it's kind of just a place to share memes and videos and just share a bunch of ads. And that's really all the content you get anymore. And then occasionally, there'll be a personal post from an actual friend or family. But a lot of times, it's just a picture they shared on Instagram anyways. So, it's kind of redundant if you have them on Instagram. And then after this year's election, I also realize how toxic Facebook can be. So, do I really need it? Probably not. If I want to look at memes and videos, I can just go to Reddit. I feel like maybe I'll miss out on some stuff, though. But I'm not really concerned about it just because that's just a discussion topic to have when you see that person again. You know what I mean? Because I feel like with social media, sometimes there's just no more surprises or nothing new anymore. Because there's been times where someone will bring something up. And then I'll be like, oh, yeah, I saw that on Facebook or Instagram. Like I saw that on your story. And then the conversation is over. Because there's nothing more to say because I already saw it. And I already saw it happened. And it's like, sometimes it ruins the conversation. It's happened a few times before. So, I'm not super upset about that, I guess. So yeah, I deleted my Facebook. I've been wanting to for a while anyways because I don't ever post anything. And when I do post something, it's usually just a post from Instagram, like I said. So, it's redundant if you have me on Instagram. It's just the same content. So, I don't know. Like, I think it's kind of funny that people like my picture on Instagram, but then they'll also like it on Facebook. It's like double likes, I don't know. Speaking of Instagram, so I did delete some Instagram pages. I had more than just my podcast Instagram and my personal one. I had a crafting page one. I think I called it like, 'melizasworkshop' or something like that. I don't know. And I don't know why I thought I could work full time, do podcast, and also start up an Etsy shop. So, that page originally is for me to showcase my work to start up an Etsy shop. And I gave myself an unrealistic goal to not only open an Etsy shop, but to also create a customized birthday card for all of my friends and family. And if you are an avid listener, then you'll know that I speak about my family and how huge it is.


19:22

So, I couldn't keep up with that. And there was a point this year where I just had a creator's block. So, there's like a few months of me not creating anything at all. So, there's a few months of people not getting a birthday card from me. And I feel kind of bad. Because I made some for some people but not for other people. And it's not feasible. And I don't know why I gave myself a goal because there's just way too many people in my family and to do a customized card for each one? That's just ridiculous. And I don't want to also just make a generic one. And everyone gets the same card. I don't know. So, that goal, I obviously did not fulfill that goal this year. And I probably will never give myself that goal unless I just absolutely have free time. But even if I had free time, there's months where there's just birthday after birthday after birthday. And that's just family. So, I'm not even including friends. So, yeah. I deleted that account, because I couldn't keep up with the account, first of all. Because I hate posting on social media, like I said. And then I couldn't keep up with the Etsy shop because I was making cards, not through the Etsy shop. And that was already a lot. So, even though it wasn't that many, I've only made one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I think I made seven cards I actually got paid for. But now it's already a lot. Because they're all different. They're not like, mass produced, I guess. Like there's not a template. Each one is specific to the person they're giving it to. And that's kind of... that takes a lot of work and a lot of brainpower. So, that. I got burned out by doing that. And because I'm also new to using my paper cutting machine, so I bought myself a Silhouette Cameo 4 for Christmas last year. Because I wanted to do more crafting. And so, not only is it like a learning curve, and trying to figure out the software, but then trying to make a card for everybody, but then also creating an Etsy shop. It was just too much, and it wasn't fun anymore. And I thought I'm not going to do this Etsy shop anymore. Like crafting is my hobby. And if it stops being fun, then it's kind of pointless to me, you know? But apparently, it's an INTJ thing to monetize your hobbies. I think I read that on the subreddit, or something. Anyways that one's done.


21:59

And then I deleted a weight loss page, I had a weight loss page. And because I was part of Fit Girls Guide, if you guys have ever heard about it. But they recommend that you either use your personal account or create a separate account for your weight loss journey, I guess. To interact with other people who are also in the program, to keep each other accountable and blah, blah, blah. And again, I hate posting anyways, and I can never keep up. And there's these goals that you do, or you post every day something. Like something related to the program. And I never completed a goal. I don't think I ever... Or not a goal, a challenge. I've completed the goals in real life. But I always forget to take a picture or to post. So, I've never completed a social media challenge. I don't think. Unless it was an easy one like you do for a week. That's easy. But a lot of them are like 30 days. And that's just too much for me. And I never kept up with it. And I never kept up with the girls. Because they also encourage you to comment on each other's pages and post and, you know, give each other kudos and words of encouragement. And it was just too much. Because social media is also socializing. And you guys know, I'm an introvert. And introverts need a break from socializing too much. So, that was too much for me. So, I deleted that. And if you guys are thinking of deleting your Instagram page, my biggest worry was losing all those pictures. But you can actually go and request for all of your data on Instagram and Facebook too. So, if you're scared of losing all your info, don't worry. Well, you can request for it. And I think it does take a couple days for Facebook to generate all that. But they will give you the zip file of all the pictures you've ever posted on Instagram or Facebook. And you can save that. So, you don't have to worry about losing all your pictures if you want to delete your Instagram page or Facebook page. So, that's another cleanse I did over Thanksgiving break. So, I deleted my Facebook, deleted these extra Instagram pages. But I did keep my personal one. Just so that I can still, you know, stay on the grid if you will. And connect with family and friends. And I still have my podcast Instagram. So, I still have that one. But if you guys are following that page, you know that I'm not super active on there either. I post maybe once a week, just to let you know when a new episode is out or to randomly share a meme or something on my story. I was really active at first because I watched a bunch of YouTube videos about how to get more followers and how to get more engagement on social media and blah, blah, blah. And I was doing that. And I was commenting and liking strangers' posts, depending on their hashtags and stuff. And I was trying to spend... I think there are... I forgot the video, I think it's like, 'Spend at least 30 minutes a day on social media, interacting with other pages that are like minded individuals' and blah, blah, blah. And it's supposed to help you get followers and stuff. But I hated every second of it. And it seems so ingenuine. Because that's not what I would do normally anyways. I hardly ever comment on people's posts, even with friends and family. And for me to go out and do that with strangers is kind of weird and not natural for me. And I don't know why I did that. Because I'm not doing this podcast for the money. I think I was just really eager to get those likes and those followers. And I realized, like, no, I'm not going to do that anymore. That's very ingenuine. That's not who I am. That's not what I do. And I hate it. So, why would I do it anyways? Because this podcast, if you like it, you like. If you don't, you know, there's thousands of other podcasts. I'm not doing this for the money. This is a hobby for me. It's the same as the Etsy shop. Once it stops being fun, I'm not gonna want to do it anymore. So, I stopped doing that. I don't post every day. And I figured if I get listeners, I'll get listeners. So, you know, thanks for you guys who stuck around. Anyways, that page will stay so that I can inform you guys of any news to the podcast and interact with you guys. So, as long as the podcast lives that will live.


26:59

So, after deleting those apps and... well deleting the Facebook and deleting those extra accounts and stuff, I started to realize these bad habits that I acquired, I guess, because of these apps and because of social media. And I really don't like it. And it's actually really embarrassing to admit, but that's the whole love-hate relationship with social media that I have. But what I realized is that I check my phone a lot. Like too much really. More than I really need to. It's embarrassing to admit, but it's like, the first thing I do in the morning is check my phone. So, once I wake up in the morning, the first thing I do is go on to all the apps, like social media apps and check everything. And it's just become a habit. And I don't know about you guys, but sometimes when I go through stories, I'm just clicking through them just to get past them. Like I'm not really absorbing what's happening. And I don't know why, but that just became a morning ritual for me. And I really hated that after I realized. After I deleted my Facebook and wanted to go on Facebook and just scroll, but there's nothing there. Because I deleted it. I realize how much... like how often I do that every single day. Then throughout the day, I kept reaching for my phone. But then I didn't know what to do. So, I just put it back down. But just that action of reaching for my phone, which is such a regular thing, but I didn't realize until I got rid of some apps that... Like I just go for my phone just automatically. Like habitually. And it's so weird. And I bring my phone with me everywhere. I kept checking to see if I got notifications. Anytime there was any type of downtime or wait time, I instantly grabbed for my phone. And this is really embarrassing but I will literally grab for my phone when I'm waiting for something, like waiting for a document to load or open up. Or while waiting for a meeting to start. Or anytime I needed to wait for something, even if it's for a few seconds, I would grab my phone. And it's weird. It's like I have to always stay constantly stimulated by something. I just didn't realize how many of these habits I adopted because I was on my phone so often, until I started deleting stuff. And honestly that's one of the reasons why I don't like social media so much. So, like I mentioned earlier in the episode, I do have a love-hate relationship with social media. And let me go through some of my hate for social media. One of the things is kind of what I was saying, it's time consuming and addicting. So, when I did have Facebook, sometimes I'll scroll through Facebook and not realize that a whole hour has passed by. There have been times when I'd plan to get up, work out, walk Link, make breakfast before work. But then I lose track of time because I was scrolling through my phone the whole time. And that's pretty bad to waste that whole entire time just scrolling through Facebook. It's honestly so embarrassing to admit these things. But the reason why I wanted to do a social media cleanse, because that time can be better spent doing something else. Another reason why I don't like social media is because it's very, very, very toxic. I've seen some nasty comments come out of some people. Sometimes they're from people, you wouldn't even have expected to say that. This year, especially. My goodness this year.


30:51

It's already bad enough people are dealing with the anxiety of the pandemic and the election. But then to come to social media and only see people arguing and attacking each other? That's kind of... You know, other than the memes and the videos and the ads, that's really all Facebook is, to be honest. Even before this year. This is not special to that. It's just a place where people argue with each other about how their opinions and ideals are better than the others. And if you don't agree, then you're just trash. That's the gist of Facebook. Memes, videos, ads, and trash talking. And it's just kind of ridiculous. And it's just so... I don't know. I don't understand people's need to argue with each other all the time, especially with strangers. It's the weirdest thing. And then we have to deal with fake news or real news, right? So, what are we supposed to believe anymore? Then now Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, they're all filtering the data for you. But how do you know that they even know what's real or fake? Like, why are they now censoring things? And I'll get into censorship a little later, though. And then on top of that, a lot of the videos and sometimes the articles people love to share, are also very depressing. Like, you know, yes, there are happy videos. I do like the fun, cute animal videos and stuff like that. But there are just a ton of depressing articles or videos. And it's like watching the news. It's so depressing. Then if you go into the comments section of any popular posts, you'll always get these negative jerks who just... they have to. They have to comment. They just... I don't know, they just have to comment on something. And people can just be so awful. So awful. Which leads to social fatigue. So, if you listen back to my 'I'm very tired' episode, it can be very draining and depressing to constantly be on social media. And all it is, it's just people berating each other. And it's just... it's too much. Like people, I don't know, I guess people are just a lot braver, courageous behind the screen. And it's just such a toxic environment. And sometimes it can lead to more gossip. So, for example, when you look at a picture and instead of being happy for that person, you make fun of them or speculate or create stories based on tiny details you see in the picture, regardless if it's fact or not. And I'm not going to lie and say that I haven't done that myself. And don't tell me you haven't looked at a picture and either said or thought in your head like, eww, did that person do that? Or I can't believe that person chose that. Or, wow, that person's obnoxious or mean that person let themselves go. Everyone does it. And if you don't, then you must not be following anyone on social media. Just kidding. But seriously, people do that. They create stories out of people's posts. And sometimes they'll make speculations, and they'll share those in, you know, chismis with their... or sorry, gossip with their friends or their family. And then sometimes people forget what's real or fake or what someone just said. Or, you know, speculating or what's actual fact and... Let's just... we don't need more gossip. Gossip ruins lives, people. Don't gossip so much. Then it can also lead to body images. So, I talked about this in my 'Body dysmorphia & Me' episode. So, definitely go check that one out. But if you haven't noticed, everyone on Instagram is a model. I don't know how it is for everyone in their explore page, but I rarely ever see an overweight person or average looking person on my explore page. They're always thin, fit, have perfect hair, perfect makeup, amazing clothes, etc. Even plus size people aren't your average plus size people. They still somehow have a flat stomach. And then they have like a huge butt and huge boobs. And I guess that's what makes them plus size? I really don't know. But I can tell you firsthand that plus size women, at least the ones I know and including myself, we do not have flat stomachs. Not like the people on Instagram. And then going back to like my 'Body dysmorphia & Me' episode, I do touch on this a lot in there. Well, not a lot, but I do touch on it in there. But you know, BDD affects a lot of people. And now men are being heavily affected. And not too long ago, we're talking about how bad body image issues are with women. But now the men are catching up. And I could totally see how that is. Especially with the social media.


35:46

Because again, in my explore page, I don't know about you guys, but I never see men like average Joe's, you know? You still see the "picture perfect" quotes. You can't see me do quotes, but I'm doing quotes. But they're always the women, you know. They're super fit, have perfect hair, perfect pearly whites, blah, blah, blah, you know, not your average Joe. And so, I can totally see how being constantly seeing that and constantly exposed to that, can affect men too. You know, body image is an issue for everyone. And social media doesn't really help with that. That's kind of my hate relationship with social media. It's just that it can really affect your self-esteem, your judgment and just your overall psyche. And this, like my... I don't know if I want to say, hatred. Because it seems like a really strong word. But I guess my highly dislike towards social media, I guess also, kind of got a little... the fire kind of got fed more after I watched the social dilemma on Netflix. So, I've been wanting to do a social media episode for quite some time now. But the social dilemma on Netflix kind of made me want to do even more. So, if you guys haven't watched it, I would watch it, but be really wary about some of the messages that they're trying to send. And I'll go into that a little bit. Just go into it with an open mind and know that it's a Netflix documentary. If you see Netflix docs, they always have some type of agenda or message they're trying to send. So, that's why I'm a little iffy about the whole thing. Just because... well, we'll get into that. But they did do some good in there. They do hit you with the facts in the beginning that are fairly known and evident. They talk about how these tech companies come up with a system to predict what you want and when. This is part of their ad algorithm. That's why it always seems like Instagram or whatever, somehow knows what you're thinking. For example, how you're thinking about buying equipment for your podcast. And boom, there's an add on microphones. And this is all good stuff to know. You know, I like that they added those factual things that people may kind of already know, but it was never really confirmed. Well, this documentary, you kind of hear it straight from the source. So, that's pretty awesome. Because you do hear from the people who actually created these things. These are former Google employees or Pinterest employees or Facebook employees. And they were actually a part of that, creating all of that stuff. And they tell you, I guess, firsthand. So somehow, Netflix is able to get a hold of all those people and do a documentary on them, or, you know, interview them. But then it kind of gets a little creepy. Because they start to talk about Google and how Google has a feature that filters and organizes what you'll see first when you search for things. Meaning it's catered to you based on the info that they have on you. So, they like... I don't know, research you I guess or like they collect data from you. And then they cater your search engine based on what they know about you. So, if you google the exact same thing as someone else, you may not get the same results. Which is weird, right? And I actually started using DuckDuckGo, which is not supposed to do that. However, there are some people saying that they may not be as private as we thought. But at the same time, it's like, well, I guess I'm not surprised. I haven't looked into that yet. So, I don't know if that's actually true. I just wouldn't be surprised if it was, you know. Because the only people who actually have true privacy are people who are disconnected or totally off the grid, you know. Like the egrets in the Philippines or the Aboriginals in Australia, you know. But DuckDuckGo is supposed to be more secure. It doesn't collect all your data like Google does. Just go check it out. See what they're all about. And the search engine, it's completely different.


40:15

But learning about that in the documentary, that's just crazy. Like, I know, I've always known that they're collecting data. But like I said, this doc kind of just validated that for me. I'm already a skeptical person. And I don't trust the news or social media. I always feel like the news outlets always have some type of agenda. This Doc, unfortunately, kind of fed into that already large skepticism of the mind. Because it makes you wonder, why? Why does Google choose what you see first? Why does the news pick and choose what to show the viewer? And so, just showing the full story? What is their goal with doing that? What's the logic behind it? So, this is an example. So, I don't know if you guys watch the news. But during the election, the news or Trump decided to go on the news to talk, I think he was talking about voter fraud, if I remember correctly. He was talking about voter fraud. And the news completely silenced him. So, they showed a clip. And then the news decided that they're no longer gonna show the rest of his clip. So basically, he went up to speak and then they just silenced him and cut him off and said, "We're no longer going to show the rest of whatever he's talking about." And I was thinking, why? Why are they censoring him? Why didn't they just let him talk and let their viewers determine for themselves whether they want to believe him or not? Because let's be real, you guys, that half of America are either going to agree or the other half are just gonna think he's a joke anyways. So, what's the point? Why bother with the censorship? Just let the guy talk, you know. Like, let me decide what I shouldn't believe. Like, I don't understand why the news is doing that for you. That's not their job. The news is just the news. It's supposed to just show you what's happening, what's the current event. But then they're trying to create a narrative or block information to you guys. Like I don't understand... or to us, not to you guys. To us, that's just so weird. Like, why? And that, you know, goes back to the documentary. So yeah, there's some good things, and they do give you the facts. They're like, how social media is working and how they're collecting your data and what they do with that data. However, I do have to say that this documentary, too, has its own agenda, which leads to my cons. So, I didn't care for the dramatization. So, when you guys... if you guys decided to watch it or if you already watch it, they have these little clips. And I thought it was just unnecessary. I hate when documentaries try to add too much emotion into their film. Let the facts speak for themselves. Allow the viewer to feel whatever emotion they want to feel based on the facts presented to them. Don't decide for them how they should feel. Because that, to me, is no longer a documentary when you're telling the viewer how they should feel about something. It's honestly just a really long a*s ad for the cause they're fighting for. That's what it is. And I just didn't think we needed the little cutscenes they added with that. That kid from Santa Clarita died, forgot his name. And it just was unnecessary. I think they could have done the whole documentary without all that junk. Also, side note. For those who watch it, did you notice how that girl behaved? The young girl? If you haven't watched it, spoiler alert, which isn't really a spoiler, I guess, honestly. Because I could do without the whole dramatization. But there's this little girl. And she is disobedient and rude and disrespectful to her parents. Because her mom or whatever, wants to take her phone away so that they can just have a normal sit-down dinner. And she was super rude about it. And she broke the container that her phone was in and took the phone and ran upstairs. And I was like, are you serious? That girl is so lucky she didn't grow up with my parents. That would not slide with my parents. With that said, I thought it was interesting that they were blaming her behavior on social media. And, I mean, I'm not a parent. So, take what I say with a grain of salt. But how much of it is social media? And how much is from bad parenting?


45:06

Like, my parents would never let us disrespect them like that. Like, that's... I don't know, I don't know if I can... if you can argue that it's social media's fault. I think that's a weird argument. But like I said, I'm not a parent. So, what do I know? Anyways, I also didn't care for the fight for censorship and regulations. I kind of mentioned that earlier. Whether you like Trump or you hate him, I still didn't think it was right for the news to censor him. Let people decide how to feel with the facts presented to them. I think that should be how all news outlets are. Just give the facts and people could come up with the conclusion themselves. They can do what they want with that, you know. I think it's weird that the news creates a narrative for you and tells you what you should, or, you know, gives you specific details. It's just the weirdest thing. And so, okay. Anyways, back to the censorship. So, I did mention this in a prior episode. And I don't know, maybe I lost people because of it. I really... I don't care. But I did mention that I am a libertarian. So, censorship and regulation is a little tricky for me. So, in this documentary, you're going to see the causes that these people are fighting for. These people meaning the people, former employees of the different social media empires. And some of them are trying to fight against social media. And one of their... or some of other solutions to all that, like the toxicity of social media and how it's out of control and how it's a breach of privacy and blah, blah, blah. Anyways, so their solution to all of these to, you know, combating the elite social media empires is by involving more government. And so, they want government to regulate social media, and regulate the interweb and be a bigger player in all this stuff. And that was like a red flag to me. I was like, whoa, this documentary went from good to bad real quick. Because for me, I think instead of more government involvement and over regulation, I think the fight should be to just stop using these apps altogether. Or to... if you don't want to do that, boycott them, right? Because we are the consumers. And I think people forget how much power a consumer has. I've heard, for example, that people think it's very ridiculous how much athletes and artists and musicians...not artists, sorry, musicians and actors and actresses make. And how much it costs to go see a person in concert. For example, I remember... I forgot who was like... was it Justin Timberlake? Or somebody for the VIP access, it was 1000 bucks. And it included, I don't know, I think you get a good spot, obviously. And then you can also meet the artist and have a special one-on-one meet and greet with the person and a picture with them. And I was thinking. I mean, I don't know about you guys, but I don't idolize famous people at all whatsoever. And I would never spend $1,000 to go shake some person's hand and take a picture with them. You know what I mean? I think that's ridiculous. And I think that's little... what's the proper word for that? It's just very high-and-mighty of these people to say that a picture with them and a quick meet and greet with them is worth $1,000. Like, I'm sorry, that's ridiculous. But maybe I'll do a separate episode on that.


49:25

But anyways, those people who think it's ridiculous, which is pretty much everyone. Well, not everyone but a lot of people think is ridiculous how much these famous people make and how much it costs to go see a game or see a concert or even see a movie. Tickets have gone way up since I was younger. And people forget. Well, you're the consumer. I know this seems very simplified. But basically, if you get enough people, say you get all of Justin Timberlake's or whoever's fans and you decide to boycott the person and just not buy any tickets until they lower the price to a more reasonable price, then that's really all you have to do. Then you're golden, you know? You don't have to buy their merch, don't buy their tickets, don't buy anything. It'll force them to have to lower their price so that people will buy it. Because they gotta, you know, obviously make money off of it. And, you know, if you do that, say that you actually got away with doing a boycott, you got enough people to do it, and they, you know, lower their prices. But they only cut prices somewhere else. Like if those mega rich celebrities just decide to cut funds elsewhere with their staff, especially what their lower paid staff instead of cutting their own pay, do you even want to support this type of people anyways? I mean, that's really why cancel culture is so powerful. But you know, obviously, with great power comes great responsibility. And cancel culture is a little tricky for me too. But that could be a separate episode, too. Anyways, so you know, this concept that you're the consumer and you get to decide and if you get enough people to boycott something, they'll lower their prices. Because they have to sell. They can't just be like, no screw you guys. We're gonna keep our tickets to 1000 bucks. No, they have to sell. And that's how you get it done. But people, they idolize these famous people, and I doubt it's going to happen. Anyways, this same concept can be done with social media. If you get enough unhappy people to boycott Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, whatever, then they have to listen to you. They have to listen to their consumer and determine what needs need to be met. People can start a virtual war against social media, you know. Spread the word, try to get people to stop using social media until their needs are met. And if they don't meet their needs, then you know, someone else could be Mark Zuckerberg. There's plenty of smart people on there who can start their own social media platform that can fulfill your needs. I think it's crazy that we just have these key empires, when we should just have other people starting other apps. I don't know. I don't think we should leave it to the government to fix the problem. Because there's a good chance that they will. And it can possibly just make the problem even worse. I know that sounds overly simplified, but that's really... like if you get enough people, it would work, you know. Enough people left MySpace. And enough people left Friendster and enough people left Zynga. You don't even really hear about these anymore. These social media... I think are social media platforms, sorry. I think they're still around. But they're not nearly as big as these other ones. I doubt it'll ever happen because people love these apps. People love social media. Anyways, if you haven't watched the documentary, I suggest going to watch it but maybe just don't take it too seriously. So, I've talked a lot about why I don't like social media. But it would be wrong for me to say that there weren't any positives with social media. For example, it has provided a livelihood for some people. I remember watching some of my favorite YouTubers literally go from extremely broke to millionaires. You get to see them actually start from the bottom and go up. And some of these people also contribute to charity work and donate to a lot of causes. So, it has done some good for some people. Social media is also a great way to spread awareness about certain issues, that people may not have realized what's going on. This year is actually a really great example of that. Then I'm sure there's other positives.


54:15

But the best thing that social media has ever done was connect people. And a great example of that is the fact that my family here in America can connect to our family in the Philippines. And I don't know if you guys remember because I don't know how old you guys are. But I remember my mom having to purchase phone cards. And having to load her phone with minutes. And also, text messages just to keep in touch with her family in the Philippines. So, you would literally have to go to the store. Like we used to go to the Oriental market. Or even the gas station sometimes will have it. But they used to stock up in these phone cards and they gave you certain time limit to call abroad. And so, you had to buy these cards, just so that you can call someone abroad. And this one time in high school, I also remember. I went to the Philippines and I wanted to still keep in touch with my then boyfriend now husband, and it cost 50 cents for every text I sent to him. And my mom was not happy when we got back home. Because I still... I think I texted him almost every day, which is terrible. But now, she can text and FaceTime and call our family in the Philippines anytime she wants. I'm talking about my mom. Because I just remember, when we would call my family, we just had to cross our fingers and hope they were home to answer the phone. And then we only had an hour or two hours depending on how much money my mom spent to talk to them, until we got cut off. And I just remember, like... I don't remember if it's an automated message or feels like an actual operator, would tell us like, "You have like 10 minutes left.", "You have five minutes left." And then that was it. Then you had to say your goodbyes. But now it's just unbelievable. Like, my mom will literally text your family almost every day. They have a little group chat with all the cousins and aunts and uncles in the Philippines. And that's just really amazing. That's the best thing social media has ever done is to be able to connect people from thousands of miles away. Because I do believe that social media did begin with good intentions. I think they really did just want to connect people. Even though I have this love-hate relationship with social media, I'm still on the grid, like I said, I kept to my Instagram page, my personal one. And I do have some other apps like I do have read it. I don't really use it that much though, I kind of use it mostly to get ideas. Like I get my some of my podcast's ideas from there. And I get some of my crafting ideas from there and just random stuff. But I don't use it to socialize or anything like that. I do have Nextdoor. This is mostly just so I know what's going on in my neighborhood. So, if you don't know what the app is, it's an app that connects you with your neighbors. It's a place where you can post what's going on in your area. And then sometimes the Sheriff's office will share stuff also. Like emergency alerts and whatnot. People post on there like, if they lose their dog or their cat or pet, whatever. And people use it to see just what's going on. Like what's a current event, what people should know, what's going on. Some people use it to socialize, like treat it like Facebook. But just ignore those posts. Because you can filter what kind of posts you want to look at. So, I always look at the crime one. Just to see what's going on in my neighborhood. Because there's some weird things that happen in our neighborhood sometimes. Like, this one year. I think when we first moved here, we had a lawn pooper. And it was this homeless guy that went around and pooped on people's lawns. I don't think he's around anymore. I'm pretty sure someone caught him on their security camera. So, they were able to get him. But that was weird. Then this year was just awful. I mean, there's a lot of reasons why this year is awful. But our neighborhood has been dealing with some weird stuff. And some very sketchy stuff. Like we've heard quite a few gunshots this year. And earlier, people were just constantly... what's it called? Blowing up fire. I don't think you blow up fireworks. Lighting up fireworks in our neighborhood. And then a group of hooligans spray painted and broke the windows of all the cars parked on the street. So, they didn't touch the cars in the driveway. And that's because I guess it was just like a group of people in one car. And their buddy was hanging out of the passenger window, like tagging and breaking the windows on the cars on the street. So, that's why they didn't touch the cars in the driveway. And luckily for us, we're parked on the driveway. But it was just really sad when I was walking Link and I saw all these cars and shattered glass on the ground. And having like... I think it was like orange spray paint or red spray paint on people's cars. It was really sad to see. And it made me feel like we were in the apocalypse or something. Like walking dead or something. And then packages are just getting stolen left and right. Because obviously people aren't home. There's more Amazon packages and stuff and people are just taking advantage of the fact that people are having, you know, retail therapy during this whole pandemic.


59:58

And then now it's like, holiday time. So, I'm sure they're out and about doing that, too. But yeah, this year has just been a little crazy. But I keep Nextdoor for that. Just current events and things I should know. Then lastly, I still have my podcast Facebook. And that one, I had to create a fake Facebook page. So, I created a fake Facebook page. You can't just have like a... I think mine's like a business page, or I don't remember what they call it. But anyways. So, I still have that. And that's more just to inform people who may not use Instagram but use Facebook. And I treated it the same as my Instagram page. And it's kind of redundant too. Because what I posted on Instagram is kind of what shows up on Facebook. But sometimes they don't link. So, I have to do a special post, I guess. But that's just more to inform people about new episodes and what's going on with the podcast. But just like the Instagram page, as long as the podcast is alive, that will be alive. So yeah, I'm not a big fan of social media, as I mentioned before. But I'm also not completely off the grid because I still want to connect with people and connect with friends and family and now connect with you guys, the listeners. So, that's what I'm going to use it for. I don't really see the point of posting every day or posting about my life. And quite honestly, my life is kind of boring. Unless you guys want to see me crafting or I don't know, working, which I'm not allowed to record what I do for work anyway. So, I don't really have an exciting life to share on social media anyways.


1:01:46

So, that's the episode. I hope you enjoyed that episode. I just have one more going out and this will be the end of season one. I don't have a set date for season two yet. Because there's some things I need to do. And prep before I start up the podcast again. I'm sure I'll talk about it more in the next episode. All right, thanks so much for listening. If you enjoy the show and want to stay the know, please follow me on Facebook or Instagram. You can also check out my website at thetalkativeintrovertpodcast.com. All the information will be on there, as well as in the show notes. Please help support the show by rating or reviewing it on Apple podcasts. If you leave a review, I'll make sure to feature it in this show. Thanks so much and I'll talk to you guys in the next episode.

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